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The advancements made in technology is (are)
it will include isolation and becoming lethargic ( The sentences are incomplete; at times subjects are missing or at times collocation errors are there)
When physical interactions doesn’t happen (don’t happen)
pushing themselves to dangerous (sedentary) lifestyle
Feedback: Examples are missing, avoid being repetitive with the vocabulary. Be careful with “Subject- verb” agreement. Need to work on sentence structure, in order to make complex sentences try not to loose the basic essence of the content.
Band: 2/6