-
* Please look up ‘sentence examples with ‘whereas” . Sometimes, commas are used before ‘whereas’.
* ‘the right path in their lives however, they are very likely’ ( I feel like the a second sentence could have started from ‘however’ here. Without even a comma, I think this is what grammarians call a ‘fused sentence’)
* ‘pre-schools, where kids can get involved with various events, achieve better’ (Please look up ‘when to use commas with relative clauses‘. If I’m not wrong, the commas are not needed here)Score:5/6
There is good grammatical control and a developed range of vocabulary. I recommend re-reading your essays and looking more closely at the lexical and grammatical choices to find things that can be improved.
