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Introduction is incomplete, not stating the solutions.
if everyone in the family uses their private transport to commute (,) (it will result in road jam) as a result it enlarges the road jam.
B.P 1, is mentioning solutions, stick to pattern as discussed in class . Single idea per paragraph
If over bridge (is) available
More bicycles path can help to less logjam although (moreover,) it is reduces the air pollution as well. –
no other vehicle are (is) allowed on that lane
conclusion is again focusing the solution, “causes” part has not been discussed. Hence, not summarizing the paragraph completely
Band: 3/6
