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The map shows ( maps show) how the road access to a city hospital has developed in 3 years from 2007 to 2010. There have been several changes, the most noticeable being the progression (construction) of two roundabouts at both ends of the hospital road, elimination of bus stops, and adding a bus station, ( addition of a bus stop) and separation of the car parking area.
In 2007, the city hospital was surrounded by a ring road that connects (connected with ) the hospital road at the southern end of the city hospital. On both sides of the hospital road, there were six bus stops in total, three stoppages on each side, and a common car park for staff and the public on (in) the east. The car park has (had) the entrance from the ring road. Finally, the hospital road joins (joined) the city road at the farthest south of the map.
Turning to the 2010 map, it can be seen that two roundabouts have been made at both ends of the hospital road to improve traffic control. On its east, the car park remained the same, albeit it has been separated for staff only and a new car park has been constructed beside the ring road in the east. All the bus stops along the hospital roadside have gone and a new bus station can be seen on (in) the west.Word count: 217
Feedback:
The response has a clear overall progression and organization as it is introduced, the main features are identified, then it clearly compares the first map with the second. There is a mix of vocabulary, with the right language of location used to say where things were positioned and the language of comparison and contrast used to good effect to show how things differed or remained the same. It does not score well in GRA as there are several tense and conjunction errors in the answer which limits the score.
Band Score : 1.5/3
