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* ‘buying through online platforms’ (‘buying online’ is more common. ‘online’ can be used like an adverb without any prepositions.
* The second sentence in the first body paragraph (Many online shopping…) used a comma before ”which” even though it was not necessary there. The second sentence, interestingly, does not use a comma before ‘which’ even though that would have made the sentence clearer. Look up ‘when to use commas before which’ and ‘when to use commas with relative clauses’.
* ‘Amazon entitle their customers’ (the use of ‘entitle’ in this way looks a bit peculiar to me)
Score : 4.25/6 (The task was addressed properly and the ideas were relevant and expressed clearly. However, the word choices are not always stylistically appropriate. Some of them do not collocate well. The problems with grammar are also easily noticeable. )
