[Unknown Member]

Tourism has become more frequent in modern days than in the past because people love to travel and explore the world. Although there are still drawbacks of tourism, I think its source of revenue in many countries are more significant.

On the one hand, Many countries had made tourism as a side business. People from different states attracted to tourist places. To begin with, so many cities are earning lot of money from travelling, because people often visit to their attracted places. Visiting too many people to a nature spot can increase the income and popularity of that place. For example, in India, Goa is one of the famous region where all the people from different countries to enjoy the climate, beaches and games. By these Goa is becoming popular and also good in terms of wealth.

On the other hand, Tourism can often cause environmental damage. Thousands of people visiting one particular place frequently will affects the nature’s beauty. Mainly the raise of population can cause cultural problems, and risks like pollution. These cause can be more dangerous to the local community peoples. Health issues can be occurred like dust allergy, breathing problem which can lead to death. For example, the hills of famous Ooty region are now filled with plastic bags and wastes left by the tourists. In addition, Throwing plastic wastes in the tourist places like forest and water banks, will severely affect the animals living in that region.

In conclusion, it is true that tourism benefits revenue in many countries. However, its disadvantage such a environmental damage and risks of local community cannot be ignored.

[JUBY]

Overall it’s a good attempt except for certain grammatical errors.

Appreciate the usage of cohesive words like “on the one hand”, “to begin with” etc.

Be careful of the article usage. For example: add ‘the’ before population, add ‘the’ before local community

Found some incorrect usage of prepositions.

Reduce the use of repetitive words.

Band score 3/6.

Best wishes