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Task 2 essay – Private Tutors
Many parents today employ private tutors to teach their children after school hours.
Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
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6 Replies
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some missing articles
* ‘with the increasing difficulty level of…’
* ‘positive development for the brighter future’
* ‘not just benefit teachers, but the nation’s …’* ‘has lead to an increase in’
* ‘are a positive development’
* ‘advanced concepts’ (not ‘advance concepts’)
* Please look up the definition and some sentence examples of ‘admittedly’ to make sure you are always using it in contexts that make sense. In this essay, it seems fine.
* ‘This might lead to their children struggling more’Score : 4.5/6
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Nowadays private tutors are being employed by many parents to teach their children after school hours. In my opinion, hiring private tutors to teach children is a good practice.
A child needs good guidance to be good at a particular subject or field. Schools have abundance of children and it becomes very difficult for a school teacher to focus on a particular child. Due to this many children perform poorly in their academics. Parents usually hire a private tutor to overcome this problem. For example, there was an article published in The Tribune which states that 90 percent of the students passed in their exams after hiring a private tutor. Not only did they pass but performed well in their examinations.
The World is vast and everything can’t be taught in schools. Music, sports and swimming are examples of such subjects which are not at schools. Many great personalities in these fields had private tutors. Without their help the child’s talent would have been lost. For an instance, Jurgen had a private tutor teaching him how to play football and afterwards he became one of the great sporting icon. He had talent from a young age but with the help of tutor he did much better. Tutor helped in rectifying Jurgens’ mistakes. Jurgen never had a school teacher who taught him like a friend but his private tutor became his pal.
To conclude, private tutors can teach a variety of subjects and especially the ones in which the child shows interest in. The child gets much deeper understanding of the field when taught at personal level.
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* ‘Schools have abundance of children’ ( Usually, we say ‘an abundance of something’ . I haven’t seen it used that much while talking about people)
* ‘Due to this, many children perform’ (Due to this, many children perform)
* ‘ Not only did they pass but performed well in their examinations.’
I believe it should be ‘but they performed…’ because the verbs in both clauses are different [pass, perform]. ‘They not only passed but also performed well’ is probably correct.
* ‘The World is vast’ (I’m not sure why ‘World’ had to be capitalized here)
* ‘ Without their help the child’s talent would have’ ( Without their help, the child’s…)
* Please look up ‘for an instance’ vs ‘for instance’
* ‘he became one of the great sporting icon’ (‘one of the’ and ‘one of my’ are always followed by plural nouns. Here , it should be ‘icons’)
* ‘Tutor helped in rectifying Jurgens’ mistakes’ (The Tutor helped in rectifying Jurgens’ mistakes)
* ‘The child gets much deeper understanding of the field’ [I believe it should be (The child gets a much deeper understanding of the field)]
Score : 4.5/6
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Students in this generation are more intelligent than students from previous generation. Many parents appoint private teachers to make their children to learn after school hours. In my opinion, this is a negative development, because it ruins their childhood and makes them stressful.
To begin with, home tuition helps children to get extra input from each subject. If the concepts taught in school were not clear, then they can clarify their doubts with their private tutors. For instance, one of my neighbors arranged a special tutor for her daughter to crack IIT JEE entrance exam, and she succeeded in that exam. Apart from this, it is a great boon for parents who go for work. As they are working it is not possible for them help their children while studying. Hence, these are the benefits of private tuition.
On the other hand, even though there are positive developments, there are negative developments too. Children are not machines to learn all the time. They need some time to relax and play in their backyard after their school hours. For example, my peer arranged a tutor to teach her seven year old daughter after returning from school and her daughter was affected by mental illness due to stress. Moreover, children cannot develop their talents. Engaging them in studies does not help them to develop other skills instead, it make them to hate studies. Therefore these are the impacts of private tuition.
In conclusion, it is true that employing private tutor for children has both positive and negative sides. However, I firmly believe arranging private tutors for their children will not help in a long run because they need some leisure time to relax and to develop their hobbies.
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* ‘private teachers to make their children to learn after school hours.’ (private teachers to make their children learn after school hours) [ ‘to’ not needed with make. ‘make someone do’, not ‘make someone to do]
* ‘ it make them to hate studies.’ (makes them hate studies)
* ‘ will not help in a long run’ ( will not help in the long run)
Score : 5/6
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