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* A couple of incorrect word choices (they didn’t fit well in the sentences) – indulge,
* I wouldn’t use ‘let us see’ in the thesis statement. Check out a few thesis statements in sample essays.
*Problems with plural nouns . “make decision” in second paragraph should be ‘decisions’
*’underestimate’ is written as a single word, no space.
* In the conclusion, you probably meant ‘better not to include juniors’
4/6
