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  • Shahbaz

    October 28, 2021 at 12:19 PM
    50 Network Points
    Activity Points 7670

    *’ women are not allowed to’ (women were not)
    * The sequencing of ideas could have been improved in the first body paragraph.
    * ‘every one’s’ (everyone’s)
    * In the conclusion you said ‘movies play a vital role to spread fear in the society’. However, this idea was not mentioned in the body paragraph. We always restate what we have already said in the conclusion.


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