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* The essay is slightly longer than it needed to be. It’s not a problem in itself. A long essay is not a problem as long as you have the time to proofread everything and your ideas don’t lose their focus.
* ‘environs’ (This word is listed in the dictionaries I checked, but I don’t think it fits here. Please check)
* Please review ‘increase in the phenomenon of migrant labour’ . It sounds incorrect to me.
* ” millions of migrant labour.” ‘abour’ can be used collectively to refer to workers. However, when you specify them with a number, shouldn’t it be ‘labourers’?
Score: 5/6