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In Introduction, similar sentence structure , humans ….. however, humans…… ( paraphrase it effectively)
make sure “r” and “u” should be clear. There are certain words which I failed to understand because of this.
second body paragraph has not been presented as question demanded , it talks about the solutions we have to combat the situation, but question was what are the other opportunities. It is inclined to partially developed essay.
keep writing!!
Band: 3/6
