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Discuss both views – [Doctors in rural areas]
In some countries, there are not enough medical or educational facilities in rural areas. Therefore, some people believe newly graduated teachers and doctors should be sent to work in rural areas for some time. Others think that people should be free to choose where they work after graduation.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
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8 Replies
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In some countries, people say that newly graduated teachers and doctors should be posted in rural areas because of less medical and educational facilities there, while others believe that people should have the freedom to work where they want to. Both sides have pros and cons which we will discuss in this essay. In my opinion, people should have the freedom to choose wherever they want to work.
People living in rural areas have the right for best medical facilities. As there are very few people willing to work in these backward areas, there is need of good doctors and teachers there. According to me, people should be sent only for a limited amount of time to work in these areas. The graduates should not feel complete cutoff from the developed world which can have adverse effects on their mental health. For example, one of my friends after graduating from a prestigious college was posted in a rural area where he felt lonely and committed suicide.
It takes a lot of time and effort to graduate in a particular field and people graduating have their own aspirations and goals in life. Some people want to stay with their family and others want to explore a particular city. If a person has worked hard to work in his/her dream city, it should not be snatched away. This can have an adverse effect on their upcoming generation. For example, a colleague of mine was posted in a village and in a year he was blessed with a son. As his son matured, he made friends with the boys in the village and became a gangster which completely ruined their family.
To conclude, people graduating should have the freedom to choose where they want to work as many lives are attached to them.
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* ‘have the right for best medical facilities’ (Please check out some sentence examples with ‘have the right’ , usually it is used with ‘to’ and not ‘for’ –> ‘have the right to the best medical…’)
* ‘there is need of good doctors’ ( ‘There is a need for good doctors’ [ ‘need of’ is not wrong. However, in this context, I think ‘need for’ works better)
* ‘The graduates should not feel complete cutoff from’ (completely cut off)
Here’s a sentence example ‘I’d just gotten off a ship, where I was completely cut off from all news.’
* ‘and became a gangster, which completely ruined their family.’ (missing comma) [Please remember that although a comma was used here, they are not always used before ‘which’]
Score : 5/6
Clear and mostly error-free writing.
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In rural areas there is a shortage of medical and education facilities. Some people believe doctors and teachers who graduated freshly have to be sent to work in those areas, whereas others think that it is their freedom to choose their work place after their graduation. In my opinion, it is individual’s interest to choose their location to work.
Young graduates from the field of teaching and medicine should work in rural areas. If they are allowed to work in those areas, then people in that area will get all facilities like people living in other areas. For instance, many rural areas have changed into urban areas and metropolitan areas due to the increased facilities in medical and education. In addition to that, some incentives have to be given to the young employees. It will encourage others to work in such areas. The more the graduates work there, more developed the area will be.
The choice of the work location has to be decided by the graduates. As every individual have their own problems, none of them can interfere while choosing their place to work. For example, they may have time constraints and lack of transport facilities. Apart from this, they have to take care of their families as well. They have to provide good education for their children and their parents have to get good treatment if needed. Hence, it is not fare to force anyone to choose their location to work.
In conclusion, people working in the field of education and medicine more than they work, they do service to the society. So they have to decide where to do service for people, and it should not be forced by external powers.
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* There are some word choices which are probably not completely accurate. For example, the ‘interest’ in ‘it is individual’s interest to choose their location’ . Perhaps, ‘it is an individual’s right’ is better.
* There are many error-free sentences. Compared to some of the essays you posted before, this one has very few mistakes as such.
*’As every individual have their’ (has) [ when ‘every’ is used with a noun, we treat it as a singular noun]
* ‘none of them can interfere while choosing their place to work’ ( I think here you meant to say ‘nobody should interfere with their right to choose their…’. Please read the sentence again )
* ‘it is not fare to force anyone to choose their location to work’
(it is not fair to force anyone to choose their location of work)
Score : 4.5/6
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In many countries, medical and educational facilities are not appropriate in some villages. Because of that, few people think that recently pass out teachers and doctors should work in rural areas for some duration while others argue that people should have right to work wherever they want to, after finishing their studies.
Due to the lack of medical and educational facilities in villages of many countries people get inadequate treatment of their diseases and do not get a better education system either. If newly graduated doctors and teachers invest some of their time in those locations, then it will help villagers in the improvement of their health because new doctors expertise in the advanced knowledge and equipment to treat the various diseases, and, if teachers educate the children with modern methods, then education systems will be improved. For example, in India, many villages still suffer from the lack of treatment and children of those areas are lagging from good teaching facilities. If these professionals help those people, then they can come up from the shortcomings of medical facilities and illiteracy.
On the other side, some people argue that these professionals have the right to choose the place of their work because like other professionals, they should be allowed to work anywhere in their home country or abroad. These people, who become a doctor or teachers after intense hardship in their fields, should not be bound to work in rural areas. To illustrate, these people also have the right to work from their choice like chartered accountants, engineers suchlike.
To conclude, in my opinion, professionals like doctors and teachers should give some of their time to the betterment of rural areas so that those people get the good facilities regarding the medical treatment and modern education system. In this way, villagers can equally participate in societies and it improves the status of the rural areas and it also helps in the development of those countries.
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* ‘are not appropriate in some villages.’ ( ‘appropriate’ alone won’t convey the meaning you need here. It should be ‘are not appropriately developed’ or something to that effect)
* ‘pass out teachers and doctors’ (This is incorrect. ‘recently passed out’ might be better, but I’m not sure if that’s completely correct)
* ‘Due to the lack of medical and educational facilities in villages of many countries, people get inadequate treatment of their diseases and do not get a better education system either.’ (added a comma)
* ‘because new doctors expertise in the advanced knowledge and equipment to treat the various diseases’ (This clause is not complete. It should have been ‘because new doctors have expertise in…’ or something similar)
* The use of ‘suchlike’ in the last sentence of the second body paragraph is incorrect.
Score 4.25/6 (The points are relevant are expressed somewhat clearly. However, the word choices and not always natural. )
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