[jaidheesh]

Dear Sir or Madam,

This is regarding the advert in Gulf today newspaper asking for volunteers to support a walkathon in Abu Dhabi. I would love to be part of this generous cause of helping the poor displaced people of Africa on account of the natural disaster that happened recently.

The plight of the poor homeless people in Africa who lost their homes on account of the devastating earthquake is very saddening indeed for everyone. On account of this natural disaster, we must do our part to help these destitute people who have no means to support themselves.

In the past, I had volunteered in countless events because I am very passionate to give back my time to help the community. My organization and management skills are really extraordinary which help in the successful conduct of all my past volunteering events that I had helped in.

I could help by setting up signboards or by putting up the necessary barriers for the charity walk. Moreover, my family owns a dress company, and we could help in printing the T-shirts for the people who are going to participate in the walkathon.

Hoping you would consider me for this noble cause.

Yours faithfully,

Paul Hinder

[Anureet]

OPENING STATEMENT: This is regarding- I am writing this letter regarding

be part- be a part

BP 1: on account of- redundancy

BP 2: which help in..- rewrite it more clearly

BAND SCORE: 2/3 Keep Writing!

[Gurleen]

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to you in regards to the advert posted in the New York Times on 20th July asking for volunteers to support a charity event held by your company. I would like to be a part of this generous cause of helping the physically challenged children.

I have always been saddened to see the plight of the physically challenged children and the difficulties that they face in their life. I would love to do whatever I can to help these children achieve their aims in life. Your organisation is doing a wonderful job in organising such an event.

Over the past few years, I have been actively involved in various charitable events. My participation has been maximum with Team Sidhi, a volunteer team that helps senior citizens. Moreover, over these years my management skills have been enhanced and I am sure that I can be a valuable asset to your company.

I could help in finding the sponsors for the event since I have a great network with the multinational companies who could be interested. Also, I could help arrange the food and drinks at the event since my friend runs a restaurant.

I am really looking forward to the chance of being a part of your event. Please do reply back.

Yours faithfully,

Steve Madden

[Anureet]

The letter is well written

BAND SCORE: 2.8/3 Keep Writing!

[Madhumitha]

Dear Sir or Madam

I am writing to you regarding your advertisement in The Times of India newspaper published last week asking for volunteers to support a fundraising event. I would be interested to contribute my service to this event, since the amount collected is intended to be used for a social cause.

I understand from the article that the collected money would be used for the health care expenses of abandoned elderly people, therefore it could benefit them at their most desperate times. Hence, I would be very delighted in lending my hand to volunteer for such a noble cause.

In the past, I have been involved in several charity events in my school days since I was an active member of the National Service Scheme. Last year, I was a part of the fundraising team at my work which helped to pay the educational fees of destitute children.

I would suggest that conducting rally at main areas of the city, by displaying sign boards which will depict the cause of fund being collected would be of more help. I could help by setting up the display boards as I am a design engineer, therefore I could come up with more creative ideas.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

Madhumitha Murali

[Anureet]

BP 1: at their- in their

volunteer- volunteers

BP 2: to pay the- to pay for the

BP 3: at main areas- in the main areas

BAND SCORE: 2.5/3 Keep Writing!

[Swati14]

Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing this letter regarding the advertisement which was published two days back in the newspaper “The Hindu”. I also want to be part of this Charity event and want to distribute free food to the people who will be present at the event.

In India, it can be seen that some people and children are unable to get nutritious food for themselves. Some less fortunate infants are dying due to malnutrition which has already been distraught my heart. Because of that, I often take part in welfare affairs for many years.

I have owned a restaurant in the Mumbai location where I distribute some free food packets to poor people daily. I am also a member of a charitable trust named as “Hunt the Hunger” in which collect leftover food from various location and distribute to the needy people.
Additionally, I can set up a food stall at the event and serve to all the attendees of the occasion. Moreover, I retain some logistic connections which can provide transport facilities to help people for finding the venue.
I am looking forward to hearing from you and I hope that I will be a part of this novel cause.
Yours Faithfully,
Rhea

[Anureet]

OPENING STATEMENT: the people: people

BP 1: distraught my heart- distraught for my heart

BP 2: which collect- which I collect

location: locations

BP 3: retain: have

write full name

BAND SCORE: 1.5/3 Keep Writing!

[PRIYA]

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter to you with regards to an advert I saw in times now on September 11. You are looking for volunteers who can help to run a wellness campaign at the Devid’s old age home. I am very much willing to work with you in this social cause by helping those elderly homeless people.

Being from a joint family I personally feel the value of having your own grand parents, how much they love their grand kids and in return they expect only love and care nothing else. I wholeheartedly want to help such people and really want to earn their blessings only along with doing something for my society’s welfare.

I have a few friends and relatives who are from medical background and some of them are doctors, certainly my contacts will help us in planning and execution of this wellness camp. I can also ask for some charity from my office friends as well as from some more social contacts to buy some first aid kit for the old people which we can distribute them during the campaign.

I am eagerly looking forward to get this opportunity to become part of this noble cause. Please update me soon.

Yours faithfully

Nehaa

[Anureet]

OPENING STATEMENT: times now- Times Now

very much- not required

BP 2: nothing else- not required

the old people- the elderly

them during- amongst them during

BAND SCORE: 2/3 Keep Writing!

[Nitish]

Dear Sir or Madam,

After coming across your advertisement in the Times of India newspaper, I would like to express my interest in volunteering charity event on cricket by local school teams for helping differently-abled children. I have been part of this kind of event before and would love to join this event too. Being socially responsible, I am continuously engaged in other events supporting a similar cause.

I am a member of the cricket club and hosted many such events in our club in the past. This club is located in the center of the city and well-versed with all the high-tech facilities which are required for an event. I have been handling promotion and marketing for a couple of years and raised more than 200k USD in 10 events.

If allowed to be part of this event, I would like to lead the promotion and marketing area and would do my best to take this event to the next level based on my experience.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

Nitish Sharma

[Sheeba]

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter regarding the advert in the Times of India published on 23rd of September asking for volunteers to conduct a charity event. I would like to be a volunteer in a charity event to raise the fund and to provide their basic needs.

I am interested to indulge in helping others since from my childhood. During my school days on the last day of the academic year my school management arranged a visit either to an orphanage or old age home to show our love towards them. Also we gave dresses and food when we left the place.

During my college days I have joined in the team to raise fund for the Help Age India community. Every year I used to collect money from my kith and kin to contribute them. Once a year we will be visiting the place directly to share our love and foods.

My friends and I are connected with many social service groups. For the event I can arrange food. With the help of the members in the social service group I can arrange for dress. For senior citizens we can arrange for health check up and for students we can provide stationery item. I request you to accept my ideas and if you have any ideas better than mine please feel free to share with me.

Looking forward reply from you.

Yours faithfully,

Sheeba Jebin.