[Nikita]

Travelling is something most enjoy but restricted due to circumstances for few people. Some argue taking a trip to foreign place is necessary to learn about the place whereas, other say, one can learn about abroad through technological devices. This essay will discuss the view and give opinion on, is travelling necessary to learn about foreign places or gaining information through technology is enough.

To commence with, taking a trip to foreign places has it’s beneficial like the exploring new culture, and diversity, all together a different experience of memories which can’t be found by not travelling. For instance, when family travel to abroad, learn different things like, children pick up the language, mother is keen cuisine and father enjoys the architecture. Hence, the actual encounter of the place gives an adrenaline rush and enriching which is not likely to happen by not taking the trip and once a year a trip should be planned for new experience.

Secondly, travelling is not easier to say and be done, it takes days of planning. As well as, the accommodations and cost of the trip is not affordable to everyone. Therefore, people tend to learn about abroad through TV and internet. For example, a student needs to write a report on unexplored foreign place which makes it difficult to travel in the last moment, so uses the source of technology to learn about the place. Hence, taking trip to abroad is good for exposure but not affordable so best way to acknowledge about yourself is by learning through devices.

In conclusion, travelling is an essential part of life as it gives exposure and enriches a person which can’t be gained through devices. One may learn about it but experiencing the journey matters.

[Shahbaz]

* errors related to the use of articles

* multi-clause sentences sometimes contain errors.

Score : 4/6

[Aniket]

Few people argue that travelling abroad is a necessity to understand about a country. On the other hand, some crowd argue that information are readily available on a TV and the Internet so it is not much required. While travelling abroad can create meaningful experiences, on the other side it can save efforts of an individual through the means of mass media.

As it is lucid that, visiting different nations can give deep and sound experiences. This is because, as someone visits a place they are more likely to get connected with the society. For instance, they learn and experience different languages, accents while asking there way to reach at certain destinations. Moreover, visiting local areas where there is no internet access and learning about one’s traditional culture. Overall, understanding values of that particular area.

It is interesting to note that, since the introduction of the internet and advancements in the modern gadgets, all the information are easily available at our fingertips. As an example, one can use google maps 3D view, also different virtual reality devices can create a similar feel as you are at that place. Moreover, lot of blogs and you tube videos are available on the net which can be used as a learning medium about wide spectrum of things a nation offers and can save both time and money.

In conclusion, although it may seem that, these modern appliances can save considerable time, energy, and cash but on the other hand, internet and TV has a limitation, not every places have it. Furthermore, for best experiences it is advised to travel, as it can leave fruitiful effects on an individual.

[Shahbaz]

* “some crowd” is incorrect if you mean “some people”.

* “information is” not “information are”

“As it is lucid that, visiting different nations can give deep and sound experiences.”

* “the comma after ‘that’ is unnecessary. We do not use commas after ‘that’ in sentences like ‘It is clear that ….’

“This is because, as someone visits a place they are more likely to get connected with the society. For instance, they learn and experience different languages (and) accents while asking <s style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>there </s>(<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>their) way to reach <s style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>at </s>certain destinations”

“Overall, understanding values of that particular area”

*This sentence is incomplete.

“It is interesting to note that, since the introduction”

* The comma in this sentence too is unnecessary. Look up ‘that clause’ and check out some sentence examples.

* In most cases, ‘although’ and ‘but’ cannot be used in the same sentence.

Score estimate: 4.5/6

[Shahbaz]

* Please ignore the paragraph with all the code in between.

You should have used ‘their’ in the place of ‘there’ and ‘at’ is not needed with the verb reach. “I reached Mumbai” not “reached at Mumbai”

[Tanya]

Does it require traveling to gain knowledge about the other country when we can get information about every nation through TV and the internet? Well, that is quite debatable. Let us find out this in the following paragraphs.

First, traveling a foreign nation is not only a source of entertainment, but also it provides us a sight to view different cultures, traditions, language etc. Our desire to explore a new world and then compare their lifestyles with ours is fulfilled when we visit other parts of the globe. Furthermore, by meeting individuals of the other countries, we get to know about their mindset and also what they think about our country. For example, recently my trip to South Africa changed my thinking about that country’s people. I used to think that Africans are not welcoming but actually, they were very helpful and friendly.

Next, visiting abroad does comes with a lot of expenditure. Moreover, traveling to some countries like the USA requires many visa formalities, which can be frustrating for some people. Also, language and food sometimes become challenging while staying in a foreign nation. For example, it is hard to find vegetarian food in some parts of Thailand. Also, many people do not understand English there. Getting information through TV and the internet becomes the only option for some people as it saves a lot of money and time.

Travelling has become a passion for several people around the world. In my opinion, if you want to explore a country and you have sufficient funds with you then the ideal approach is to visit it.

[Shahbaz]

“Next, visiting abroad does comes<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”> (does come) with a lot of expenditure. “

Some word choices felt like they could be improved. The grammar is mostly error-free.

Score : 5/6