[Vishwas]

In this growing world several sectors are emerging day by day and one of them is Tourism

More over to that traveling is the most common activity which is entertained by everyone

around the world. but everything which involves human will have a concerned problem which

affects the environment. This will be further elaborated in the essay that what are the issues

caused by tourism and what are the certain activities which can solve them.

To begin with, tourism is one of leading business around the world and it helps a country

financially. Firstly, a tourist is coming to enjoy the place and that is why they are not

concerned to behave in a disciplined manner and it leads to problems like pollution. Secondly,

they are visiting new place and if they haven’t done a good amount of research they might

be unaware of the place culture which leads to another issue which is disturbing the culture.

For instance, tourists coming from USA to India starts exploring places and randomly visit ad

temple without taking off their shoes and in India it’s not allowed to wear shoes in temple.

That’s how tourists affect the environment.

On the other hand, to solve these issues things which need to be done are. Firstly, constructing

tourism centers in every tourist attracting places. Secondly, awaking the locals about how to

guide tourist so that they do not affect the culture and teach them how to do certain things.

for example, A tourist who visited India for the first time can be guided that he/she can not

wear any leather material things while entering in temple. these small exercises can help

to solve a huge issue.

In conclusion, tourism can be promoted more and more to make a healthy world but this can be

possible only if they respect the other places boundaries and follows the place rules and

regulations.

-Avoid repetition of connectors.

Overall= 5.5/6

[Vishwas]

It has been observed that technology is growing day by day bringing something new in market which is helpful for humankind but which also is a threat for them in many other ways. Out of all kind of innovations online shopping is the most successful minimal yet a great invention for buyers and sellers but it has also become a threat for offline market. These things will be further elaborated in the essay, that what are the merits and demerits of Online shopping.

Online Shopping was available to people from many years but it was not been used that much. But in some recent years it has been boosted because of covid-19 and having an easy approach to smartphones which helps in online shopping majorly. These days most people have become lazy and they do not prefer to go out for shopping that frequently, it’s an alternative which is comfortable and saves a lot time for people in their busy life. But it brings many kinds of threat to offline market or shops, as the business of many sellers has become worse. Online market brings so many great offers or discount, which is not possible in offline market. But looking at how online market works in detail it can be said that it’s not a threat it’s an advantage.

For instance, Amazon is huge company which is only sector from 2010, it has never been an online market who creates products they just buy from sellers all-around of world and make it available for buyers in any place of the world it’s just a link between buyers and sellers belongs to different places and they are buying from offline market only then how can it be threat to them. It just affects the small shops of the same region or area not for whole offline market.

So in conclusion, I do not agree with the statement that offline shopping is vanishing because of online shopping. It may be affecting some shops but It is not completely affecting whole offline market.

Conclusion- lacking in task response.

Thesis statement- quite informal

Overall-6.0 bands.

[Vishwas]

It is been observed that human tend to have competitive nature which leads them to push themselves. This can also be taught from the start that how to look at competitive behavior in which manner, so that it may help in their future to grow more. This will be primarily discussed in this essay, looking at both scenarios of competitive and competitive nature in the younger generation.

Elaborating the topic in detail, it has been stated that children learn majorly from their home or from educational centers which conveys that the one who’ll be teaching them how to or not to react on things are parents of the spouse or the tutor. If we look at the competitive environment then its clear that it will be observed mainly in schools or any education institutes and if we look at collaborative part it will be observed in both.

Moreover, to that a competitive nature pushes an individual to work hard and a collaborative nature makes you a team person, on the same hand competitive person will be jealous if the competition degrades them and the team person will always be dependent on others to become better. For instance, a racer in a 100m race will have more chances to win then a person who has participated in a relay race of 400m. because 100m racer is not dependent on anyone its all in his/her hand.

If we talk about my opinion both are good in their own way and it totally depends on the individual either to be competitive or to be collaborative and if its me then I’ll choose to be a competitive person because I believe in growth and am independent as a person.

-It has been observed-1st sentence

-lack of lexical resources.

-Concluding sentences and paragraph is not well structured.

Overall-5.5 bands.