Falak
FacultyForum Replies Created
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 5, 2022 at 10:47 AM in reply to: Task 2 ( discuss both the views) : economic progressSome people argue that majority of governments thinks that their Important role is to economic developments, while other say that all types of developments are equally important for a country.
While development of the country governments should put their efforts to increase the industries setups, increase in the production of agriculture goods and to focus on the export and import of the goods, which will facilitate the economic growth. I believe that boosting the economy will impact on the human life style, human per capita income and country will stand in the good position in the world. For examples, the China has main role to boost their economy and they work hard to develop it and now the country has 20trillion$ economy.
On the one hand, the financial condition of the country plays the vital role in the world level, this will distinct from the other country. There are various aspect to develop the country economy, Here, Government should focus on the increasing the agriculture production, Industrialization and the adapt the new technology which will boost the economy.
On the other hand, all other aspects are also important such as social growth, human development, education system, the human mind will help the people to get innovative ideas, furthermore, good education system will enhance the practical & theoretical knowledge of the people, which will help to develop the country.
In conclusion, although people are thought of the economic growth are more well focused rather than the those who are focusing on all the aspects for the country developments.
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 8, 2022 at 10:47 AM in reply to: Task 2 ( discuss both the views) : economic progresswill pen down with (not required) my thought of uplifting both the economic and other related (crucial) aspects of each country.
need to work on conditional structures
band: 4/6
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 7, 2022 at 10:18 PM in reply to: Writing Task 2: Discuss both views (climate change)in the following paragraph(s)
natural phenomena, which may bring (is responsible/ can cause) the Tsunami, Cyclone, draught
cyclone or blood (flood) hits.
company may become bankruptcy. (bankrupt)
In addition to this (,) working professional
Hence (,) this will directly Impact on (“on is not required) the business
above will (have adverse/ detrimental) impact on the business
the hospitals (need) to be setup.
industries needs to be setup (Industrial growth will be witnessed)
For instance (,)
I would say climate change is badly (has negative impact on business) effect the business rather than the positive impact
Band : 3/6
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 7, 2022 at 9:59 PM in reply to: Writing Task 2: Discuss both views (climate change)explosion (explanation) of my opinion
is affecting to “to” is not required) agriculture
cyclones (force people ) to change the habitat
For instance(,)
Mango session (season) start(s)
have not get mangoes (?) – faulty sentence structure
develope (develop)
has (is) affecting
in my consider (opinion)
To conclusion (conclude)
explanations are not effective especially in B.P 2 and there is strong need to work on basic sentence structure and tenses.
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if everyone seat (sits) together
seats (sits)
is truly effecting (effective)
example in B.P 1 talks about poor infrastructure in order to make it more coherent, quote the fact open space layouts
certain words are quite repetitive ( seating , sitting)
Band: 3.5/6
keep writing!!!
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in (on/at) our personal level – make right use of preposition
in the workplace the (there are) changes
portary (portray)
not only merits , demerits but conclusion/opinion also
there is no need to use “for instance” in introduction
defoliated may be not right word to use
when any person is newly appointed, they have (he has)
try to avoid the usage of “we” ,”I” until and unless they are asking your opinion
there is need of one concession statement in B.P 2 , to state your opinion
I believe effective proof reading is required as at times sentences lack helping verbs or so.
Keep writing !!
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 6, 2022 at 6:39 AM in reply to: Task 2 (Problem solution) : Brain drainfrom there (their) own
the correct usage is “Not only…..but also”
sunder pichai (Sunder Pichai)- proper noun
to deal with this (,)
appeating (appealing)
one of the example(s)
almost all the sentences in B.P 2, are monotonous in structure (must)
Would like to see more dependent clauses / complex structures.
Good effort with lexical resources.
Band: 3.5/6
Keep writing !!
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 6, 2022 at 6:26 AM in reply to: Task 2 (Problem solution) : Brain drainparagraphing should be done properly
Introduction is not highlighting about solutions
south asian (South Asian) countries and african (African) countries
migrants are unwilingy to (willingly ) leave their motherland
better salary especially in (“in” is redundant) doctors and teachers.
economoy (economy)
equipments who (which) are purchased by other
to run his (their) family
which is an identifiation (identification) for their.(?)
First body paragraph talks about causes while the question is about “effects”, hence B.P 1 is off the track .
Kindly be cautious with the points mentioned above.
Band : 2.5/6
Keep writing!!
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 5, 2022 at 11:59 PM in reply to: Task 2 (Problem solution) : Brain drainimgrate (immigrate)
which were (are) developed countries
their home countries faced (face)
in their home countries (there is ) lot of competition
careerier (Career)
There is no need to explain reasons in introduction
doctors and teachers have not got (don’t get) extra facility
to (in) the United States of America
To (In) conclusion
Feedback : This essay is not answering the question (what problems this trend is causing) . There is need to work on all the four parameters. Basic sentence formation definitely needs to be consider.
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 4, 2022 at 6:48 PM in reply to: Writing Task 2: Discuss both views (climate change)This essay analyses both positive and negative impact Climate Change has on Businesses. (along with my opinion)
unit located in (on) the Island
there are great deal(s) of interest
Thus, Climate change have (has) lead (led) to new business opportunities.
In conclusion, I advise to state your opinion with better affirmation
words like ( climate change, business are repetitive )
Keep writing!!
Band: 4/6
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 4, 2022 at 5:49 PM in reply to: Writing Task 2: Discuss both views (climate change)tackle the global warming, (this environmental shift)
Although, it is an opinion of masses that climate has deteriorated businesses (when) there are others who believe that it
This essay will illustrate the adverse effects and also positive outlook of environment shift. (along with my opinion)
global warming (has) increased which
I would suggest to come with one more reason for B.P 2, as we need to develop both arguments equally
to draw conclusion instead of being repetitive with as a result , we can also use “Hence”, “thus”, “consequently”
would like to see more variety of sentence structures (complex)
Keep writing!!!
\Band: 3.5/6
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 4, 2022 at 4:50 PM in reply to: Task 2 ( Two part question) : local foodconsumption (of) food
portray the (my) opinion
native land . (In addition to that,) Due to
Due to transport facility that has developed by the technological advancements ( Due to the developed freezer transport facilities ….. ) try to make it less verbose
I would like to see more variety (complex) in terms of sentences
keep writing!!
Band: 3/6
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 4, 2022 at 4:00 PM in reply to: Task 2 ( Two part question) : local foodIn introduction, your outline statement lacks highlights of 1st part of the question ( factors driving), same is the case with conclusion
taco bell (Taco bell) ; proper noun
every corners (every is followed by singular nouns)
First body paragraph talks about advantages , but the words and language usage should be presented in a way where reader can understand these are the factors which are driving this trend. Maybe a more coherent topic sentence will be helpful
Answer is somehow, partially developed. I would like to see more dependent clauses/complex structures.
Band: 3/6
Keep writing !!
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 2, 2022 at 12:45 AM in reply to: Task 2 (Problem solution) : Brain drainKindly upload in pdf format with sequence of pages.
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 2, 2022 at 12:43 AM in reply to: Task 2 (Problem solution) : Brain drainmajor source of skilled professional’s (professionals and they are migrating ) migration to developed countries.
with (the) least inhouse technological progress
Good attempt with good usage of lexical resources
Keep writing!!
Band: 4.5/6
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 2, 2022 at 12:20 AM in reply to: Task 2 (Problem solution) : Brain draineconomically developing (developed) nations
These (This) essay
which is causing a delay in (the growth of these countries) order to progress these countries.
but when is the time (the time comes) to give back
repeated usage of words ( insecurity, skilled,
(and thus, there will be no need )they no need to depend on other rich countries.
employees (should also be revised) also should be revised to make it more employee (supportive working culture) friendly environment.- need to avoid repetitive usage of words.
more and more migration of skilled manpower from developing countries to developed countries are (is) causing serious problems
Feedback : Need to work on lexical resources
Band: 3.5/6
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Falak
AdministratorSeptember 2, 2022 at 12:02 AM in reply to: Task 2 (Problem solution) : Brain draindeveloped nation(s) rather then (than) their own developing
evolved. (Period is not required as the sentence is in continuation and connected by which)Which ultimately hurt the growth
nations to loss (lose)
software developer(s)
to coup up with (to cope with)
then government start (started) a national reward
effort(s)
All in all, (To conclude,)
developed nation is a (“a) is redundant here) bit tricky,
professional moved (move/moving) to those countries
Feedback: Certainly, there is an effort to make complex sentences, but I would like to see more variety of subordinating conjunction , not just “which” . Great range of Cohesive devices are there like In addition to, furthermore, adding to this … need not to be “moreover” all the time.
Keep writing!!!
Band: 4/6
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 30, 2022 at 11:28 PM in reply to: Task 2 (Opinion based) : Capital Punishmentthese kind of crime(s)
make use of grammatical range especially the sentences.
keep writing!!!
Band : 4/6
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 30, 2022 at 11:24 PM in reply to: Task 2 (Opinion based) : Capital Punishment, criminal activities (have) become a major issue
who has (have) been
who came (come) across
capital punishment should (will) increase crime rate
in (to) higher level.
to developed (develop)and build a strong country.
govt. have (has) to also worked (work) on
feedback : Use proper paragraphing (introduction , different body paragraphs), second reason has not been developed fully and is looking for further explanation. Make use of complex structures and even work on basic sentence formation
Band: 2.5/3
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 30, 2022 at 11:04 PM in reply to: Task 2 (Opinion based) : Capital PunishmentParaphrasing could be more effective
it is hard to distinguish “u” and “o”
no one has the ( “the” is not required) forgotten
this twenty one (years old)
be pronounced ( this is not the right word to use here, may be to give the “verdict”
“Handwriting” can become a trouble as the certain letters are not clear. I would suggest to consider computer based test. Sentence structure could be more effective.
Band: 3/6
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 30, 2022 at 10:52 PM in reply to: Task 2 (Opinion based) : Capital Punishmentas well as (has been used almost everywhere, there is wide range of connectors , you are advised to use those)
but despite all that(,)
himself of (for) his deeds.
studies (study) of how the criminal mind works,
Keep writing!!
Band : 3.5/6
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 30, 2022 at 10:34 PM in reply to: Task 2 (Opinion based) : Capital PunishmentTo a great extent (,) I agree with the statemen
sentence (sentenced) capital punishment to five gangster(s)
who was (were) having murder, looting and rape charges,
suddenly the crime rate drop (dropped) down
it will definitely terrify to (“to” is not required) the offender before
the robbery (was) avoided.
the criminal saves (saved) him
Feedback : Task achievement , coherence and cohesion is there though I believe response includes mainly compound sentences , try to add range in structures , and there is need to go through past tense. Certain words were repetitive (looting, brutal ) otherwise effort in lexical resources is appreciated.
Keep writing !!
Band: 4/6
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 17, 2022 at 6:34 PM in reply to: Task 2 (Is it a positive or negative development): Retirementdespite of (despite)
each individual (‘s)
that ( those/such homes
many (Many) old
grandchildren’s mile stones
use variety of sentence structure .
Keep writing !!
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 16, 2022 at 12:57 PM in reply to: Task 1 (Letter writing) : Cookery schoolyou are not writing to inform but to provide feedback
who’s (whose)
closing line is required.
lexical resources could be more effective.
Keep writing!!
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Feedback : Great improvement in terms of sentence formation and cohesion.
One thing which is quite noticeable is almost every other sentence is starting with ” when….” . In order to make complex structure there is great variety of subordinating structures , make use of them.
Keep it up!!
Band: 4/6
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dispite (despite)
that is (are) essential
opportuinty (opportunity)
Try to complete in 20 minutes .
Band: 2.5/3
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Chinese spent half of the budget on food (majority of their budget/ more than of their budget
slightly by 58% (59%)
word count should be at least 150 words
sentence structure could be more effective.
Keep writing !!
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expanses (expenses)
who spent more on hamburgers and Pizza.(Fish & chips)
low income spent on (consumed) fish and chips (more) consumption more,
, as (certainly/ clearly) the least spenders
, followed by fish and chips and Pizza (pizza and fish n chips) respectively
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density (amount) of commodities
Overview, (Overall,) the highest amount
the less (least) volume
study (steady) growth
unit is million tonnes
whereas (,)
stayed constant (plateaued) until 2002.
large volume of the goods taken via (?)
band : 1.5/3
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Falak
AdministratorAugust 2, 2022 at 12:33 AM in reply to: Task 2 ( discuss both the views) : economic progresshowever is not required in the first sentence as comma ((,) and where is serving the purpose
imparative (imperative)
for example (,)
Although is contas